Reflecting ..

A time of loss seems to always be a time of reflection . We always get so caught up in our selves , in our own lives and our ways , that we take life for granted , we don't understand that in one eighteenth of a second , we could cease to exist .. It's sad that it has to come to that to make us realize that .. But loss also comes with regret , which is due to a lack of reflection prior to life altering events .. Tonight , we lost a great man fighting for his life .. And it made me think of my grandfather .. They were similar in a lot of ways .. I cried because it was sad , and I cried because I remember the pain I felt the day my grandfather died .. That man was my very best friend .. I feel terrible to have to watch these people I love and care for so much have to hurt like this , and I truly wish I could take the pain away ..
Along with my reflection I realized , even the family I don't choose to talk to or interact with , I would still hate to see go . If by chance any of them read what I post .. I do want them to know , I do love them , and I do think about them , and although I am not ready to persue relationships with them at this time , due to how our relationships with one another ended , I want them to know that if they die on me , I'm killing them when I find out ..<3 Yes , I do in fact mean my fathers' family .. We have our problems and differences , and we all have heads harded that titanium ... But they are forever in my heart ..
I wish that people didn't have to die .. forever . That they could just go to , more or less , a different country or different planet .. where we could write or call once a year just remember and communicate , and that we could join them when our time is up and be a family again .. Like Justin Moore said .. "if heaven wasn't so far away.."
This blog post is short , cause my brain scatters a bit when I cry .. But yeah .. Even if you have that one family member or friend that does nothing but get under your skin and make you cuss .... Let them know you still love them , cause you never know when the last time you will be able to do that is .. <3